♥ Smithson Simplicity ♥

Help for the Homeless

2011-12-17T13:05:00.005-06:00

This year when the volunteer assignments came out for the upcoming Winter Party in my boys 4th grade class, much to my surprise there was a request for a parent to help organize the "philanthropic project"... huh I thought? This is the Winter Party we are talking about right? Yep. It is. And I thought, awesome! I am happy to help wherever and whenever I can in the classroom, but this, helping with this is... well, it's an honor.

Wikapedia says philanthropy means "the love of humanity"—love in the sense of caring for, nourishing, developing, or enhancing. And we are turning our focus to the homeless. The plan was to teach the children a little about the homeless and what they could do to help. There are many special teachers at this elementary school. One of them has his class do a special project every year for the homeless and his idea was adopted by our class too, and so the process began. We thought carefully and then began to gather what we could. We gratefully accepted donated toothbrushes and toothpaste from a dentist friend, and nutrition bars from the incredibly thoughtful fitness center director friend, and posted sign's in an attempt to gather more. I am amazed at how generous people were, and how excited they were to be able to do something to help. I think most people want to help, and just don't know how to do it.

In the end, we had plenty to pass out. Each child wrote something special in a card. And then each child stuffed a tube sock with...

the matching sock (so that they were giving the whole pair)

a construction grade trashbag to be used as shelter from the rain, or however they needed

a candy cane and a few peices of candy

vitamine c

snack bars

water

klenex

a card

a toothbrush and toothpaste

The kids tied their sock with a 15 foot peice of really strong but thin rope, and then left for the day carrying their filled sock with instructions to have their parents help them give it to a homeless person. I am so touched at the beauty of this lesson, this simple school activity that will touch lives and teach children to love and to do what they can to help. There were some socks left over, so I filled them and brought them to work and passed them out to anyone who wanted to pass it on to someone in need, I'm thinking that sharing this experience with other people might inspire them to try it themselves. I love the idea of filling something useful with other useful stuff, keeping them in my car to be ready to pass out as I can. Today I heard from a co-worker who I had given a filled sock too. She passed out her sock this weekend, and was really touched by the whole experience and she is excited to do more. The boys see the things in my car and are full of ideas... we saw some toe warmers at Wallgreens... some gloves and hats on sale at HEB, and I have ton's of yarn to make stuff, maybe they would like to have a blanket we don't use, or some tuna and crackers, or maybe a bigger bottle of water so they don't have to fill it so often? Maybe they need shoelaces? A cloth to wipe their face and hands, some wet wipes? A card with a note inside and a picture drawn by a child? A pair of sunglasses or some sunscreen?

What a blessing it was to get to be a part of this. I am grateful for sure. And once again reminded at just how much we can all do to help, nothing is to small.

Every morning a new arrival...

2011-12-12T13:35:00.002-06:00

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.

Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,

some momentary awareness comes

as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they're a crowd of sorrows,

who violently sweep your house

empty of its furniture,

still, treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you out

for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,

meet them at the door laughing,

and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,

because each has been sent

as a guide from beyond.

-Rumi

What I love about Kundalini Yoga

2011-12-02T12:05:00.002-06:00

Here's what I love about Kundalini Yoga. The exercises we do to loosen up our spines especially hip circles, breath work, mantra, chanting, the gong, unusual poses... like frog pose:), staying in a pose for longer than I think I can by using my breath and mind, saying or hearing the words chakra or shakti, different shades of white light, feeling the prana move around, just sitting and feeling, learning about the chakra's and what it all means, that I can project love and that I feel love, feeling so full of love and peace, learning, sharing the space with everyone there, reminders to set an intention, sitting and focusing on something wonderful, gratitude that swirls around inside me after every class, learning something new every time, leaving class with a replenished toolkit, singing Long Time Sun at the end and thinking about how sweet and loving the words are, tea, so much more.

One of the sweetest voices I have ever heard singing Long Time Sun.

Giving Thanks.

2011-11-23T21:41:00.003-06:00

Thanks for this guy,

He's the apple of my eye.

Awe. Little man. Love you bunches.

A snake in my house?

2011-11-20T16:42:00.026-06:00

The class pets in the boys 4th grade classroom is a snake. Actually, two snakes. A ball python and a corn snake. Kids are given the opportunity to bring a snake home for the weekend, as long as their parents approve. I approved. Well, not really approved, but allowed. So the snake, Scaler, a ball python, was our house guest for the weekend. The littles were diligent and affectionate caretakers. Most of the weekend, Scaler's view of the world was from his perch on one of the boys shoulders... and the boys were happy to have him there. They told me that as long as he didn't "musk" on them, there was no problem, but I wondered about the validity of that. Can snakes be potty trained? And if so, who wants to be musked on? Ick. The boys were not bothered by the possibility a bit. I was not really interested in offering my shoulders to the snake, or any other part of my body. Snakes eat people. I am sure of this. Scaler looks like he is probably much to small to eat a person, and did not seem to have any interest in eating either of the boys, but still, it is a concern. Not really a valid concern, but a still a concern. In a moment of weakness, I agreed to hold Scaler, and I did, breifly. He did not try to eat me. I didn't really like it very much but I do have to admit he was fascinating and not quite as horrible as I imagined he would be. I am sticking to my rule that we will not have any snakes in the house as pets. Please please let me be sticking to this rule.

Are you happy?

2011-11-17T02:25:00.003-06:00

Well? Are you? It's your choice. Isn't that awesome? It is actually a choice. Be happy, or don't be.

A couple of skeletons and a puppy!

2011-11-01T14:08:00.003-05:00

twin skeletons! they picked these out, and were full of giggles and goofyness while wearing them. ♥

youngest neice, a puppy for halloween ♥

Just 10 minutes!

2011-10-25T17:47:00.006-05:00

My youngest boys have an ongoing school assignment from their 4th grade teacher. Every day, they are to write in their journal for 10 minutes. About anything they want. Even on the weekend. Their teacher is one smart lady. They have written faithfully, sometimes making up stories, sometimes writing about their day, even just writing their spelling words over and over. They have taped pictures in it, and created their own drawings inside. Sometimes, one of them will come to me with book in hand and excitedly read aloud a little bit of what they have just written, with a pause here and there to ask "do you like it Mom?" and I say I love it and I really do. A few times they have come to me with their books, and we sat next to each other on the couch, and they read entry after entry to me... I listened to all that was in the moment; the sweetness of their voices filled with emotion and thought and excitement, the words tumbling out of their mouths, the expression on their faces. Twins, so many similarities, so many differences. Once, after one had read me some of their book, I picked it up without asking and started to read... and was quickly told that I should ask first. Of course I thought, of course. Why hadn't I thought to ask first? They are growing up and want to keep some things for themselves, and that is good I think. I would rather they read to me anyway. Man oh man, I love my kids so very much. I remember my oldest at this age... and having been here before, I now know how fleeting my time with my children is while they are are children. It passes so quickly, I don't want to miss a single moment. I am saving up memories and enjoying this time! ♥

So all this journaling has made me think that maybe there is something there for me too. Maybe I could really benefit from writing. A written record of my thoughts... as forgetful as I am I can see how this would be handy, endless potential here really. So today I will start. I have a blank book. I have a pen. And I most definitly have "just 10 minutes" that I can spend.

Give by LeAnn Rimes

2011-09-23T06:57:00.003-05:00

Bye Bye sweet little car. :(

2011-09-06T14:55:00.003-05:00

Wrecked the car. This was my sisters car. Then, it was my car. It drove me and my family around... I loved that little car. Daily trips to work and school, to the grocery, to yoga and more. From California through Arizona and New Mexico and across Texas. A family trip. Then, through the top of Texas to Colbert Oklahoma many times, another family trip. And also, East through Texas to Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, and through Florida, all the way down to Hobe Sound, and even an accidental detour on the way back through Georgia, another family trip. So sorry little car. I am so grateful for you, you were a sweet little car and I really really liked you. RIP 8/26/11. ♥

David Whyte, The Seven Streams

2011-08-16T22:54:00.003-05:00

I listened to an interview with David Whyte and heard him recite his poem The Seven Streams. While speaking, he repeated lines that were not repeated in the written from I found online when looking for it to write it here. I have added the repeated lines as he spoke them. He calls this a "little piece" :) he wrote while up in the high country in west of Ireland. He said, "this place always has a sense of deep rest to me, and at the same time this introduction to the way, you know, this ephemeral blow through of the visitor in life."

The Seven Streams

Come down drenched, at the end of May,

with the cold rain so far into your bones

that nothing will warm you

except your own walking

with the cold rain so far into your bones

that nothing will warm you

except your own walking

and let the sun come out at the day's end

near Slievenaglasha with rainbows doubling

over Mulloch Mor and see your clothes

steaming in the bright air.

Be a provenance of something gathered,

be a provenance of something gathered,

a summation of previous intuitions,

let your vulnerabilities

walking on the cracked sliding limestone

be this time, be this time, not a weakness, but a faculty

for understanding what's about to happen.

Stand above the Seven Streams

letting the deep down current surface

around you, then branch and branch

as they do, back into the mountain

and as if you were able for that flow,

as if you were able for that flow,

say the few necessary words

and walk on, broader and cleansed

for having imagined

say the few necessary words and walk on,

broadened and cleansed for having imagined.

~ David Whyte ~

Shake the dust...

2011-08-13T21:37:00.004-05:00

This is for the fat girls.

This is for the little brothers.
This is for the school-yard wimps, this is for the childhood bullies who tormented them.
This is for the former prom queen, this is for the milk-crate ball players.
This is for the nighttime cereal eaters and for the retired, elderly Wal-Mart store front door greeters. Shake the dust.
This is for the benches and the people sitting upon them,
for the bus drivers driving a million broken hymns,
for the men who have to hold down three jobs simply to hold up their children,
for the nighttime schoolers and the midnight bike riders who are trying to fly. Shake the dust.
This is for the two-year-olds who cannot be understood because they speak half-English and half-god. Shake the dust.
For the girls with the brothers who are going crazy,
for those gym class wall flowers and the twelve-year-olds afraid of taking public showers,
for the kid who's always late to class because he forgets the combination to his lockers,
for the girl who loves somebody else. Shake the dust.
This is for the hard men, the hard men who want to love but know that it won't come.
For the ones who are forgotten, the ones the amendments do not stand up for.
For the ones who are told to speak only when you are spoken to and then are never spoken to. Speak every time you stand so you do not forget yourself.
Do not let a moment go by that doesn't remind you that your heart beats 900 times a day and that there are enough gallons of blood to make you an ocean.
Do not settle for letting these waves settle and the dust to collect in your veins.
This is for the celibate pedophile who keeps on struggling,
for the poetry teachers and for the people who go on vacations alone.
For the sweat that drips off of Mick Jaggers' singing lips and for the shaking skirt on Tina Turner's shaking hips, for the heavens and for the hells through which Tina has lived.
This is for the tired and for the dreamers and for those families who'll never be like the Cleavers with perfectly made dinners and sons like Wally and the Beaver.
This is for the biggots,
this is for the sexists,
this is for the killers.
This is for the big house, pen-sentenced cats becoming redeemers and for the springtime that always shows up after the winters.
This? This is for you.
Make sure that by the time fisherman returns you are gone.
Because just like the days, I burn both ends and every time I write, every time I open my eyes I am cutting out a part of myself to give to you.
So shake the dust and take me with you when you do for none of this has never been for me.
All that pushes and pulls, pushes and pulls for you.
So grab this world by its clothespins and shake it out again and again and jump on top and take it for a spin and when you hop off shake it again for this is yours.
Make my words worth it, make this not just another poem that I write, not just another poem like just another night that sits heavy above us all.
Walk into it, breathe it in, let is crash through the halls of your arms at the millions of years of millions of poets coursing like blood pumping and pushing making you live, shaking the dust.
So when the world knocks at your front door, clutch the knob and open on up, running forward into its widespread greeting arms with your hands before you, fingertips trembling though they may be.

Written and performed by Anis Mojgani

Diana Vishneva F.L.O.W ... Stunning!

2011-08-08T22:04:00.005-05:00

I dreamed I was dancing. Beautiful and flowing, graceful fluid strong. When I am awake, I am not really graceful, fluid or flowing, but I will say I have strong and beautiful parts. Strong because I am, beautiful because we are all beautiful in our imperfection and different strengths. Here are a couple really cool videos I stumbled across.
Part II

Part III

Brett Dennen, Darlin', Do Not Fear

2011-08-04T17:11:00.004-05:00

When I arrived in my own set of clothes
I was half a world away from my home
And I was hunted by the wolves and I was heckled by the crows
Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know
Alongside my innocence I laid in bed awake
Conflicted in these chains with the impetus of age
But like a phantom she crept across the floor and out the window

Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know

From its place on the mantle my heart and was taken down
scattered in a thousand little pieces on the ground
And out below the street lamp like an orphan with a halo
Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know
'cause it won't last - the worries will pass

All your troubles they don't stand a chance
And sometimes it takes more than a lifetime to know

Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know

The confidence is faultless your faith etched in stone
and neither could comfort you from the wild unknown
So bury your burning hatred like a hatchet in the snow
Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know

If you have a broken heart or a battered soul
Find something to hold on to or to let go
to help you through the hard nights like a flask filled with hope
Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know
'cause it won't last - your worries will pass

All your troubles they don't stand a chance
and it always hurts the worst when it's the ones we love the most
Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know

Sometimes your path is marked in the sky
Sometimes you're forced to fit in between the lines
Sometimes all that you can do is say no

Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know

I said, when I arrived in my own set of clothes
I was half a world away from my home
and I was hunted by the wolves and I was heckled by the crows
Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know

I said, Darlin' do not fear what you don't really know

We said, Darlin' do not fear

Mr. Happy

2011-07-27T16:00:00.004-05:00

Incubus, Drive

2011-07-13T12:50:00.002-05:00

Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear

And I can't help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear

Take the wheel and steer

It's driven me before and seems to have a vague

Haunting mass appeal

But lately I'm beginning to find that I

Should be the one behind the wheel

Whatever tomorrow brings

I'll be there with open arms and open eyes yea

Whatever tomorrow brings

I'll be there I'll be there

So, if I decide to waiver my chance

To be one of the hive

Will I choose water over wine

And hold my own and drive?

Aah ah ooo

It's driven me before and it seems to be the way

That everyone else gets around

But lately I'm beginning to find that when

I drive myself my light is found

Whatever tomorrow brings

I'll be there with open arms and open eyes yea

Whatever tomorrow brings

I'll be there I'll be there

Would you choose water over wine?

Hold the wheel and drive

Whatever tomorrow brings

I'll be there with open arms and open eyes yea

Whatever tomorrow brings

I'll be there I'll be there

With That Moon Language

2011-07-05T13:43:00.001-05:00

Admit something:

Everyone you see, you say to them,

"Love me."

Of course you do not do this out loud;

Otherwise,

Someone would call the cops.

Still though, think about this,

This great pull in us

To connect.

Why not become the one

Who lives with a full moon in each eye

That is always saying,

With that sweet moon

Language,

What every other eye in this world

Is dying to

Hear.

-Hafiz

I first heard this poem long ago... and love to read raw honest thoughts written for people to read, breathe, taste, live. I love it when I read something that I have read before, and find new meaning in it... and this happened when I stumbled across it again recently. A little personal insight, always needed, always appreciated. Ahhh. It is like soul food, "why not become the one who lives with a full moon in each eye that is always saying with that sweet moon language what every other eye in the world is dying to hear." Beautiful

Food for thought.

2011-06-21T16:49:00.001-05:00

Desire and The Importance of Failing; Rumi

2011-06-07T20:46:00.001-05:00

A window opens.
A curtain pulls back.

The lamp of lovers connect,
not at their ceramic bases,
but in their lightedness.

No lover wants union with the Beloved
without the Beloved also wanting the lover.

Love makes the lover weak,
while the Beloved gets strong.

Lightning from here strikes there.
When you begin to love God, God
is loving you. A clapping sound
does not come from one hand.

A thirsty man calls out, 'Delicious water,
where are you?' while the water moans,
'Where is the water drinker?'

The thirst in our souls is the attraction
put out by the Water itself.

We belong to It,
and It to us.

God's wisdom made us lovers of one another.
In fact, all the particles of the world
are in love and looking for lovers.

Pieces of straw tremble
in the presence of amber.

We tremble like iron filings
welcoming the magnet.

Whatever that Presence gives us
we take in. Earth signs feed.
Water signs wash and freshen.
Air signs clear the atmosphere.
Fire signs jiggle the skillet,
so we cook without getting burnt.

And the Holy Spirit helps with everything,
like a young man trying to support a family.
We, like the man's young wife, stay home,
taking care of the house, nursing the children.

Spirit and matter work together like this,
in a division of labor.

Sweethearts kiss and taste the delight
before they slip into bed and mate.

The desire of each lover is
that the work of the other be perfected.
By this man-and-woman cooperation,
the world gets preserved.
Generation occurs.

Roses and blue arghawan flowers flower.
Night and day meet in a mutual hug.

So different, but they do love each other,
the day and the night, like family.

And without their mutual alternation
we would have no energy.

Every part of the cosmos is draws toward its mate.
The ground keeps talking to the body,
saying, 'Come back! It's better for you
down here where you came from.'

The streamwater calls to the moisture in the body.
The fiery aether whispers to the body's heat,
'I am your origin. Come with me.'
Seventy-two diseases are caused
by the various elements pulling inside the body.
Disease comes, and the organs
fall out of harmony.

We're like four different birds,
that each had one leg tied in
with the other birds.

A flopping bouguet of birds!
Death releases the binding, and they fly off,
but before that, their pulling is our pain.

Consider how the soul must be,
in the midst of these tensions,
feeling its own exalted pull.

My longing is more profound.
The birds want sweet green herbs
and the water running by.

I want the infinite! I want wisdom.
These birds want orchards and meadows
and vines with fruit on them.

I want a vast expansion.
They want profit and security
of having enough food.

Remember what the soul wants,
because in that, eternity
is wanting our souls!

Which is the meaning of the text,
They love That, and That loves them.

If I keep on explaining this,
the Mathnawi will run to eighty volumes!

The gist is: whatever anyone seeks,
that is seeking the seeker.

No matter if its animal,
or vegetable, or mineral.

Every bit of the universe
is filled with wanting,
and whatever any bit wants,
wants the wanter!

This subject must dissolve again.

Back to Sadri Jahan and the uneducated peasant
who loved him, so that gradually Sadri Jahan
loved the lowly man. But who really
attracted who, whoom, Huuuu?

Don't be presumptuous and say one or the other.
Close your lips. The mystery of loving
is God's sweetest secret.

Keep it. Bury it. Leave it here
where I leave it, drawn as I am
by the pull of the Puller
to something else.

You know how it is. Sometimes
we plan a trip to one place,
but something takes us to another.

When a horse is being broken, the trainer
pulls it in many different directions,
so the horse will come to know
what it is to be ridden.

The most beautiful and alert horse is one
completely attuned to the rider.

God fixes a passionate desire in you,
and then disappoints you.
God does that a hundred times!

God breaks the wings of one intention
and then gives you another,
cuts the rope of contriving,
so you'll remember your dependence.

But sometimes your plans work out!
You feel fulfilled and in control.

That's because, if you were always failing,
you might give up. But remember,
it is by failures that lovers
stay aware of how they are loved.

Failure is the key
to the kingdom within.

Your prayer should be, "Break the legs
of what I want to happen. Humiliate
my desire. Eat me like candy.
It's spring and finally
I have no will.
-Rumi
From 'Feeling the Shoulder of the Lion'
Translated by Coleman Barks

About Love & Love Story ♥

2011-05-13T22:10:00.001-05:00

About Love

LoveStory:

Music Box

2011-04-21T21:54:00.005-05:00

Music Box from Mixtape Club on Vimeo.

Dream Rangers

2011-04-19T00:51:00.005-05:00

Never never forget the power of a dream. Dream big, live fully. I've got a dream too, and that's a beautiful thing!

Kind & Generous, AND From the Time We Say Goodbye. That's right, Natalie Merchant ♥

2011-04-11T22:02:00.004-05:00

Wow. Really stunning, really beautiful. She is silly and funny and smart and sweet and her voice is so moving. I went on You Tube searching for a video of her singing Kind and Generous, and found this, and I love it so am sharing. She had a new album last year, Leave Your Sleep. Its fantastic!

Boys with a camera at a wedding = FUN

2011-04-09T00:24:00.022-05:00

♥ Mandy & Chaim April 3, 2010 ♥

Ducky & Me ♥

Bobo & Me ♥

Me & Bobo ♥

Me & Ducky ♥

Ducky heads back to the camera for a close up by his brother.

The pictures are a little blurry... we danced so much the camera couldn't keep up. I learned something wonderful about dancing with 9 year old boys that night... as long as you are having fun and are willing to jump up and down, flap your arms like a chicken, twirl around and around till you're ready to fall over and fake an Irish jig, they love it!

It was a fun night, and I am so happy to have been part of it and wish Mandy & Chaim a wonderful life together. Love is a beautiful thing!

Sounds better in French!

2011-04-04T23:49:00.002-05:00

So I was listening to this song the other day, loving it. It sounds sweet, sassy and sexy! I thought about it again today and looked up the lyrics in English, and it is, well, it's just better in French!

French Lyrics:

C'est si bon,
De partir n'importe où,
Bras dessus bras dessous,
En chantant des chansons,
C'est si bon,
De se dire des mots doux -
De petit rien du tout -
Mais qui en disent long. 

En voyant notre mine ravie
Les passants dans la rue, nous envient
C'est si bon,
De guetter dans ses yeux
Un espoir merveilleux
Qui donne le frisson

C'est si bon
Ces petit's sensations
ça vaut mieux qu'un million.
C'est tell'ment, tell'ment bon

Voilà C'est bon
Les passants dans la rue
Bras dessus bras dessous
En chantant des chansons
Quel espoir merveilleux
Uummm - C'est bon. 

Je cherche un millionnaire
Avec des grands "Cadillac car"
"Mink coats" - Des bijoux
Jusqu'au cou, tu sais?

C'est bon
Cette petit' sensation
Ou peut-être quelqu'un
avec un petit yacht, no?

Aahhh C'est bon
C'est bon, C'est bon
Vous savez bien que j'attendrai
quelqu'un qui pourrait m'apporter
beaucoup de "loot."

Ce soir?, Demain?, La semaine prochain ?
N'importe quand.
Uummm - C'est bon - si bon
Il sera très - crazy, no?
Voilà, c'est tell'ment bon !

English Lyrics:

It's so good,
Just wandering around,
Arm in arm, arm in arm,
And Singing songs.
It's so good,
To whisper sweet words - ,
Little nothings,
But little nothing that can be
said again and again. 

Seeing our love-struck expression
The passers-by in the street envy us.
It's so good,
To see shining in her eyes
A marvelous promise
That sendsa shivers up and down my spine.

The're so good
These little thrills
That are worth more than a million
It's so very, very good.

It's Good - Yes, It's good
The passers-by in the street -
Arm in arm, arm in arm -
Singing songs -
What a marvelous promise
Uummm - It's good.

I'm looking for a millionaire
With big Cadillac cars
Mink coats - jewels
As big as your fist - you know?

It's good
This little feeling -
Perhaps someone with a little yacht, no?

Aahhh it's good -
it's good - so good-
You know I'm waiting for
someone who can give me
plenty of loot.

Tonight? - Tomorrow?- Next Week?
Dosen't matter when.
Uummm - It's so good - so good
It will be very crazy, no?
It's very good!

Mindful on a Monday

2011-03-28T22:54:00.006-05:00

So anyway, today I am posting something I read at a friend of a friend's house this weekend. It was hanging on the wall in their kitchen, and I loved it so much I took pictures of it so that I would remember what it said. I just might embroider it to hang up in my home.

"A good heart is both important and effective in daily life. If in a small family, even without children, the members have a warm heart for each other, a peaceful atmosphere will be created. However if one of the persons feels angry, immediately the atmosphere in the house becomes tense. Despite good food or a nice television set, you will lose peace and calm. Thus things depend more on the mind than on matter. Matter is important, we must have it, we must use it properly, but in this century we must combine a good brain with a good heart. " - XIVth Dalai Lama

So just for kicks, I typed "peaceful atmosphere" into google to see what would come up. And what did come up? Lots of ideas about things to put in the room to make it peaceful; like comfortable furniture, throw pillows, soft music, candles, fresh flowers. Very few ideas about what sort of energy or emotion would change the atmosphere in the room. Which to me, looks like most people think that to change the atmosphere in your home, you have to stage it with material stuff. I'm not entirely opposed to a little staging... Man oh man, if I had an extra cent to my name I would definitly have different furniture and the like, a TV that wasn't about to die, and a really great rug, and carpet that hadn't been drowned years ago. But atmosphere is about much more than what objects I display in my home. It is about the love that is spoken, the laughter dancing in the air, the sadness holding it's breath in the corner, a touch meant to soothe or to tickle, interest expressed, the quiet calm after a storm, the sweet comfort of acceptance, everyone helping with the chores, the lingering vibe of a compassionate act... these are the things that contribute to a peaceful atmosphere I think. The candles and music and flowers are simply icing on the cake of love.

I often feel like I should not write something unless I give the whole story. Like if I write about something lovely I must admit that things aren't always so lovely in my neck of the woods or I will be tricking everyone into thinking I am someone I am not. So here is my disclaimer. These things are sometimes a reality in my home, just not always. I beleive in love, and I share it every day with my children, and that is such a beautiful thing.

How to handle a woman :)

2011-03-23T11:45:00.001-05:00

More strong stuff :)

2011-03-01T14:07:00.004-06:00

"Strong"

The light of my life's been stolen
I've walked in every shade of black and I never thought I would get me back
It's funny how life can change you and make you who you are today
I wonder if God set it up that way for me to be

[Chorus]
Strong even when it hurts
The heat it's gonna burn gotta let it burn
Strong, strong
To make a big mistake now I've run away

There's nothing like this feeling to be free and unafraid
And who ever thought I could be this brave
Learning every day

[Repeat Chorus]

I wanna push away the boundaries
I wanna love outside the lines
I wanna stare at the sun I don't care if I go blind
Whatever comes, whatever breaks, I'll stand up straight

[Repeat Chorus]

The Breeze at Dawn

2011-02-28T22:28:00.007-06:00

The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
Don’t go back to sleep.
You must ask for what you really want.
Don’t go back to sleep.
People are going back and forth across the doorsill
Where the two worlds touch.
The door is round and open.
Don’t go back to sleep.
~ Rumi

She and Him - In The Sun

2011-02-28T09:15:00.002-06:00

February 18th, a birthday!

2011-02-24T18:47:00.003-06:00

Tyler's antics ♥

Wrestling/playing/brotherly love ♥

Tyler & Ashley... a self portrait ♥

More brotherly love ♥

Me, Tyler, Jack, Elias ♥

Happy Birthday to my little man! Tyler turned 20 years old. Amazing and unbelievable. I love you honey!

40. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Stay Strong

2011-02-19T09:20:00.006-06:00

Stay Strong!

May the Grace of God bless man
and every woman in this land
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
Whatever comes to meet us know the darkness won't defeat us
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
Some say the end is comin', to set our souls a runnin' but I say…
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
Lets all come together, take care of each other
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive

Raise Your hands in the air
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
Take a Stand Say a prayer
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
Hand in hand and side by side, with our hearts open wide
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
Help others find their way create a heaven here today
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive

Raise Your hands in the air
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
Take a Stand Say a prayer
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive

In times like these we need to remember what is real
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
United in our quest, to spread love and happiness
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive

Raise Your hands in the air
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
Take a Stand Say a prayer
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive

He Rama Rama Bolo Jai Rama Rama Bolo
He Rama Rama Bolo Sita Ram
He Rama Rama Bolo Jai Rama Rama Bolo
He Rama Rama Bolo Sita Ram

Raise Your hands in the air
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive
Lend a Hand Say a prayer
Stay Strong Keep Your Faith Alive

© David Newman, 2010

39. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Looking out...

2011-02-18T15:59:00.003-06:00

Found this but no reference to who painted it. I really like it.

38 ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Keep Your Head Up, Andrew Grammer

2011-02-17T12:39:00.002-06:00

Sweet song, sweet message. Today, I'm grateful for both.

37. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Chasing the blues away...

2011-02-16T12:48:00.004-06:00

36. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Being lost makes me appreciate not being lost?

2011-02-15T12:47:00.009-06:00

So I'm lost, and soon will be unlost. Everything looks grey today, and soon it won't right? I keep telling myself that anyway. :)

35. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Valentines Day...

2011-02-14T13:13:00.088-06:00

Last night the boys and I made 50 thick yummy heart shaped sugar cookies to take to their school today for the 3rd grade valentines party. I love sugar cookies, they are my absolute favorite and we go way back... I've been making, eating, and loving them since I was a small girl :)

More than I love sugar cookies though, I ADORE the way my little boys were so happy to see me when I got to their classroom today. ♥ Absolutely no hesitation in rushing to me and hugging me for all they were worth. No fear that they would look silly in front of their classmates, that is the best gift in the world. So sweet! All the kids got to ice and decorate their own cookie, and then eat it right away, easy and fun for everyone. The boys got a kick out of telling their friends that they had made the cookies and had touched all the dough :) It was a great party, and they had a blast.

Tyler was 10 when the boys were born, so watching them at this age is like a continuous flash back to when he was 10. I miss the boy! I got to chat with him a bit today, another wonderful valentines present. My boy is all grown up, not as into talking to his mom as he was at age 10, but is still as sweet as ever and I love him like crazy ♥

When I got home Gene cooked dinner, steak and lobster and had some beautiful roses on the table for me ♥ We've been married a long time now, and it was an unexpected surprise, I love that he took the time to do it!

I've had a great day, it's been a sweet day, and I feel very lucky to have my family to celebrate it.

So, today, I am grateful for love, and any excuse to share it! ♥

34. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Inspiration

2011-02-13T10:46:00.002-06:00

This is such an inspiration to me. It fills my heads with dreams of wandering through rows of healthy, organic home grown veggies and herbs, gathering eggs from chickens, plucking ripe juicy fruit. I realize that it takes a hell of a lot of work to get to the point this man has gotten to, and that my romanticized view is not taking the hard work part into account, but I really think I would like the work too. Now, to build a fence to keep Chester out and get started. Today, I am grateful for finding inspiration and great ideas wherever they are, and for dreams!

33. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Breathe, Pray, Laugh, and Forget the rest :)

2011-02-12T13:45:00.011-06:00

"Fix what you can, forget the rest." How simple is that? Well, for me, it is anything but simple. I find myself in a situation I seem to be coming back to again and again and again, unwillingly. Or actually, I seem to go back to it willingly, I just don't like it very much. I read the words below

and much as I know they are true, I can't seem to embrace them. Why? Why is it that I seem to find things to fixate on that I can't do anything about, and instead of letting them go, I let them meddle around in my heart and mind and cause me confusion and unease?

This seems ridiculous to me. If anyone else told me they were doing this I would tell them to just let it go and focus on things that were in their control and on things that made them happy, and to focus more on helping others because there is nothing like service or giving to pull someone out of bummed out mode.

I ~~think~~ KNOW this is a real problem for me, and I would like to make it go away. Can I just cross it off of a list somewhere? Done with that crap, finished, no need to revisit it. Wouldn't that be cool! But, I guess that's not going to happen, I somehow have to sort it out and really deal with it before it will go away. It is what it is I guess, and it is pretty important. Who wants to spend their time worrying about things they can't do anything about, when there is so much that I can focus on that is more worthwhile and even helpful to me and others? Time to go hug my boys (cuz they are real and do matter) and then for a little breathing and praying. And a good laugh or too :) Prayer and Breathe. Today I am grateful for prayer and breath and for remembering that the parts of me that don't make sense are only part of who I am and that loving myself anyway is probably a good idea. :) And that someday I might be able to cross off the parts that don't make sense once and for all, and that is something I very much look forward to doing.

On a more upbeat note, I found the cutest head board on Poppytalk,
they got the idea from House Tweaking.

I think I could totally make this for my new bed! :)

32. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Poetry by Rumi

2011-02-11T08:27:00.007-06:00

The poems and writings of Rumi uplift my heart! There are a seemingly endless number to choose from, and I had to stop myself from putting more of his work on here, but here are a few that I love, although there are many others I love just as much these stuck out and seemed to fit here today. Today, I am grateful for poetry.

Out there,
Beyond fields of wrong doing and right doing is a field.
I'll meet you there.

***

Let go of your worries

and be completely clear-hearted,

like the face of a mirror

that contains no images.

If you want a clear mirror,

behold yourself

and see the shameless truth,

which the mirror reflects.

If metal can be polished

to a mirror-like finish,

what polishing might the mirror

of the heart require?

Between the mirror and the heart

is this single difference:

the heart conceals secrets,

while the mirror does not.

***

Passion makes the old medicine new:
Passion lops off the bough of weariness.
Passion is the elixir that renews:
how can there be weariness
when passion is present?
Oh, don't sigh heavily from fatigue:
seek passion, seek passion, seek passion!

***

The beauty of the heart
is the lasting beauty:
its lips give to drink
of the water of life.
Truly it is the water,
that which pours,
and the one who drinks.
All three become one when
your talisman is shattered.
That oneness you can't know
by reasoning.

***

Dance when you're broken open,

Dance when you're perfectly free.

***

This being human is a guest house.

Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,

some momentary awareness comes

as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they're a crowd of sorrows,

who violently sweep your house

empty of it's furniture,

still treat each guest honorably

he may be clearing you out

for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,

meet them at the door laughing,

and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,

because each has been sent

as a guide from beyond.

***

There are two kinds of intelligence: one acquired,

as a child in school memorizes facts and concepts

from books and from what the teacher says,

collecting information from the traditional sciences

as well as from the new sciences.

With such intelligence you rise in the world.

You get ranked ahead or behind others

in regard to your competence in retraining information.

You stroll with this intelligence

in and out of fields of knowledge,

getting always more marks on your preserving tablets.

There is another kind of tablet,

one already completed and preserved inside you.

A spring overflowing its spring box.

A freshness in the center of the chest.

This other intelligence does not turn yellow or stagnate.

It's fluid, and it doesn't move from outside to inside

through conduits of plumbing learning.

This second knowledge is a fountainhead

from within you, moving out.

***

Keep Your Heart Awake
There are many whose eyes are awake
and whose hearts are asleep;
Yet, what can be seen
By mere creatures of water and clay?
But he who keeps his heart awake
Will know and live this mystery;
While the eyes of his head may sleep
His heart will open hundreds of eyes.
If your heart isn’t yet illumined
Be awake always, be a seeker of the heart,
Be at war continually with your carnal soul.
But if your heart is already awakened,
Sleep peacefully, sleep in the arms of Love,
For your spiritual eye is not absent
From the seven heavens and seven directions.

***

AWAKE!

The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.

Don't go back to sleep.

You must ask for what you really want.

Don't go back to sleep.

People are going back and forth across the doorsill

Where the two worlds touch.

The door is round and open

Don't go back to sleep.

31. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Yoga

2011-02-10T08:06:00.009-06:00

I haven't been to a yoga class in weeks. "Things" keep coming up. I miss it! Tomorrow is another opportunity to go, and the day after that and the day after that! I'm hoping for Friday :) Yoga. It soothes my soul and refreshes my spirit. Today, I am grateful for Yoga and for the opportunity to be able to learn from beautiful teachers and share energy with people doing the same. Even when I miss class, I am always there in my heart. An all women's Kundalini class... and I just love it. There is always some little tidbit that I pick up in class that lingers in my thoughts, sometimes popping up just when I need it. Thank you to each and every person who I share the class with, thank you to my teacher(s). I am so grateful for you.

30. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Motorcycle Rides in August

2011-02-09T07:53:00.011-06:00

Gene's friend got a new motorcycle, so Gene took it for a ride, and then took us for a ride. It was awesome!

29. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Eldest

2011-02-08T07:47:00.005-06:00

Most of the pictures from his graduation were ruined. I was so excited when she found one and sent it to me! This is now almost 2 years old but new to me. I love this boy! This is my firstborn, my "Eldest" just after he graduated from High School, flower and diploma in hand, smile almost hiding. It's just one week until his 20th birthday, I a can not beleive that my little baby boy will be will be 20. Today I'm grateful for this young man and everything that has been added to my life because he is my son.

28. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ The Rhythm and Melody of Language

2011-02-07T19:46:00.007-06:00

Bobo has been having trouble going to sleep. Last night he got out of bed several times, each time I sent him back to bed with a hug and tucked him back in, but he just couldn't fall asleep. Finally he got up again, and I told him I knew just the thing that would put him right to sleep. I told him I would read to him.

I read to him from the book I am currently reading, Dreaming in Hindi, and sure enough, he soon drifted off to dreamland with Ducky sleeping soundly beside him. And I noticed something as I read aloud. I stumbled a bit at first. I don't read out loud very much anymore, the boys usually prefer to read to themselves and I guess I got out of the habit. So I looked up the benefits of reading aloud, just to see what I could find. I found lots of information on how reading out loud to young children is beneficial. Here is what a non-profit group based in Hawaii called Reading Aloud America has to say: It helps build the pathways in their brains needed so that they can read themselves, it stimulates their language and speech development, it enhances their vocabulary and teaches them how to pronounce words and to express themselves, increases their attention spans and ability to focus on what is being said, it increases their knowledge of the world, gives them the desire to read, and makes them more curious. And although I know those are all wonderful reasons to read to children, one thing I thought was really beautiful is that reading out loud gives the experience of the rhythm and melody of language even before they can understand the spoken or printed word. The rhythm and melody of language. That is the part that I think made me stumble at first when I began to read to Bobo tonight, so I plan to start to pay more attention to the rhythm and melody, because language can be a beautiful thing. Come to think of it, for me, that is the most enjoyable part of the book Dreaming in Hindi... The author, Katherine Rich, does a beautiful job at making the words sing from the pages and painting a picture of where she is.

Here is a little more information I found interesting, from short-story writer Eudora Welty. She said "When I read, I hear what's on the page. I don't know whose voice it is, but some voice is reading to me, and when I write my own stories, I hear it, too. I have a visual mind, and I see everything I write, but I have to hear the words when they're put down" (Paris Review, Fall 1972). A decade later, Welty expanded on this observation in her memoir One Writer's Beginnings (1984), which begins with a section titled "Listening." The sounds of words--especially words on a page--formed the richest part of what Welty called her sensory education. "Ever since I was first read to, then started reading to myself, there has never been a line read that I didn't hear. As my eyes followed the sentence, a voice was saying it silently to me. It isn't my mother's voice, or the voice of any person I can identify, certainly not my own. It is human, but inward, and it is inwardly that I listen to it. It is to me the voice of the story or the poem itself. The cadence, whatever it is that asks you to believe, the feeling that resides in the printed word, reaches me through the reader-voice. I have supposed, but never found out, that this is the case with all readers--to read as listeners--and with all writers, to write as listeners. It may be part of the desire to write. The sound of what falls on the page begins the process of testing it for truth, for me. Whether I am right to trust so far I don't know. By now I don't know whether I could do either one, reading or writing, without the other."

So today, I am grateful for the beauty of language, and for those who do such a beautiful job sharing it.

27. ♥ 40 Days of Love♥ Driving with a great song on the radio...

2011-02-06T19:37:00.004-06:00

It's a great day to be alive! This was the song today, the one that came on as I was driving to the grocery store ... distracted and mind going a million directions, that made me smile a smile so huge it took up my whole face and made my eyes crinkle with laughter, and so I turned it up, then up again and sang along! For today, I'm grateful for having the opportunity to jam out to a great song on the radio and for singing along :) The song starts about 33 seconds into this video...

It's A Great Day To Be Alive - Travis Tritt - Travis Tritt Videos

26. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Life is Precious

2011-02-05T23:22:00.011-06:00

Today was a rather rough day for me emotionally and physically, definitely the kind of day I could have used a few do-overs as the day wore on. We were finishing up the project we began last weekend, sorting out, cleaning, reorganizing, and getting rid of anything and everything that we no longer need. It was supposed to be a fun positive family experience, sorta like a love cleanse, because the result was supposed to make our home into a place where we are all tidy, more comfortable, more at ease, and thus would be more open to the love that surrounds us. Well, that's how it started out anyway.

First up, the boys bedroom, which was a disaster area. I sorted and cleaned and put in a really big shelf so that they could have places for everything to go. I re-purposed a shelf that really should have just been trash and ended up with another smaller but sturdy set of shelves for the corner of their room which worked perfectly for bins of little boy treasures. About the time I started to put everything in it's new clean place, the Funk starts. Allergies. Sneezing, drippy nose, itchy eyes and throat started quickly and threatened to send me to bed but I stubbornly I kept working. The littles room now looks fantastic. And all accomplished, at least so far, with no drama except those irritating allergies and they are so happy with the results and probably just as happy that I did most of the work.

And then...Emotional Funk. I probably should have taken a vow of silence at this point. The cleaning and sorting turned into a trip down memory lane for me, but instead of focusing on the happy memories, for some reason I found myself overwhelmed at how quickly time had passed, and the realization that those times were over. I know, I know, much more joy awaits in the time ahead and in the moment now, but I lost sight of that for a bit. The more cleaned and rearranged, the sadder I got. I really felt like a chapter was closing and I don't feel ready for it to close. Every mother can totally understand this I am sure, but there I was.

Flash forward, allergy attack in full on mode, and I wish it would stop. I'm feeling sicker by the minute, still have many other things on my list to accomplish, (so now am adding in Guilt Funk into the mix) then realize that we had arranged to pick up a few pieces of furniture that some friends no longer needed. I hoped that by taking a quick hot then icy cold shower my allergies would magically disappear. Well they didn't, but my family did. Gene thought I was just going to follow him there, but the problem was that I did not know where there was. Got that all sorted out, me feeling a little miffed at what felt like being forgotten, and Gene a bit annoyed that I had not been on the same page as him. It's not been the greatest day ever, but I'm spending it with my husband and kids and we are doing something that needs to be done so I am very happy about it. Sort of. Except for the Funk which lingers even though I try to ignore it and pretend it's not there. But hey, we got to visit with a couple of really sweet friends and that is a good thing, we gathered what we were there to gather, then headed home where I quickly threw together a late meal of burgers and fries, with a chocolate coconut walnut brownie to finish us off.

And here it comes. So what to you get when you take a sick mommy + emotionally difficult work? You get me; a frazzled weepy mommy and wife, who feels overwhelmed and tired and really just needs someone to hug me and remind me that everything is going to be OK and tell me how much they love me. And a tissue for my drippy nose. Sadly, this is not what happened. Instead I tried to express to Gene how I was feeling, and as usual, did it badly, so he walked away confused and convinced that I was crazy. And so of course, my feelings are hurt.

We sent the boys to bed, I took some Benedryl, (I hate the stuff, but if allergies are really bad, it seems to do the trick. Sort of.) and waited for it to put a stop to my suffering and to gently put me into dream land... and had just made it there when I hear voices, slightly raised, slightly upset about something. I groggily stumble to the boys room only to find that poor Ducky has just vomited all over the bed and feels like more is on the way. Husband and I clean him up and get him settled in a different bed and then it happened again. Poor Jack threw up 11 times that night before finally dozing off to sleep. He woke up with a fever but did manage to eat a little bit at breakfast and lunch and hold it down. Bobo was very kind and concerned about Ducky. Perfect reminder to end a roller coaster day. A sweet reminder about what is important.

I needed to write, so figured this was a good thing to write about but first I read a few blogs posted by others and as if by magic, I read Life Is Precious by inner light yoga. It was another person reflecting on dealing with funk... and another reminder for me to crawl out of my sad head and back into my grateful heart where I'd really rather be anyway. So I thought I'd share a little bit of what she said. And today, I'm grateful for the high's and low's of life, including the funky bits.

This was posted by Journey to Light, Saturday February 5, 2011. http://innerlightyoga.blogspot.com/.

Life is Precious

Several years ago I was going through a really tough time. During this period of difficulty, I had a dream that I will never forget.I remember going to bed feeling hopeless and drained one night, and falling asleep in a state of despair and exhaustion.

I had a dream that I was dead. In the dream there was someone beside me that I couldn’t see, but I could hear a voice and feel a loving presence. I remember feeling really sad and full of remorse that I had died, and wishing that I could go back to earth, if even for just two minutes. The voice beside me offered to fulfill my wish, and sent me back for two minutes. In a blink I was dropped back down to earth in my familiar body, but surrounded by totally different circumstances...

Elated with being back, I didn’t even care about the ‘scene’ going on around me, I felt relieved and grateful just to be back. Knowing my two minutes would be up soon I soaked in every precious second of heartbreak, sorrow, betrayal and loss. After getting pulled out of this scene and back to the ‘dead’ state, I asked again if I could please please be allowed to go back for just two minutes more. The voice agreed and I was allowed to go back.

This time I was dropped into yet another totally different scenario... Knowing that the two minutes were very fleeting, I soaked in every second of ...distress, worry and uncertainty. Once more I was pulled out, floating in deadness with the loving voice. Again I asked to go back, and again I was given that wish.

This time I became aware of an interesting time distortion, in the scene around me everything was falling apart, I was feeling the impossibility of ‘holding it together’. Knowing the two minutes would end soon I drank in ‘falling apart’ and the feeling of losing control. I noticed that what felt to me like two minutes was different than the time line playing out in the scene around me. Hours were racing by in the situation around me, while my two minutes were very slowly ticking by.

At some point I became aware that I was dreaming and a very lucid thought, ‘OK you have made your point’ shattered the dream. I found myself lying in bed starting at the ceiling. For a few minutes I drank in the sensation of being alive, really alive. I drank in what it means to be human, and the sweetness of all the things we experience here. Something about this dream had given me a glimpse of just how rare and precious it is to be human.

The memory of the dream has faded somewhat over the years, but the feeling of life being fleeting and precious has never really left. I am often reminded of this dream during times of overwhelm or strong emotional responses to situations. I am often reminded to take the time and drink in sorrow, overwhelm, or heartbreak; knowing that the whole thing is so very fleeting. Our humanity is truly a gift to be cherished.

Thank you, Journey to Light, for your beautiful post!

25. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Snow

2011-02-04T11:21:00.004-06:00

We rarely have snow in Austin, but the last couple days have been really really cold, at least for Austin, and the weather predictions were all saying to expect snow last night. I was hopeful but not convinced. Sure enough though, I woke up at 3:30 this morning and peeked outside and was greeted by a blanket (ok so it was thin in places) of white. It was beautiful and crisp and I couldn't wait to show the boys. Gene heard me moving around and woke up and got to see it too. No school or work for us today, yay! The boys woke up bright and early and were so excited they wanted to go right out and play. So we bundled up in our warmest clothes (again, it's Austin, so we don't really have cold weather clothes) and went out to enjoy. They made snowballs, snow angels, ate way to much snow, and had a great time. They have been in snow twice before in the 9 years they have been alive. Once when they were about 4 and we went to visit family in Utah where they got to play in deep snow and go sledding and make a real snow man, and once a couple years ago when we had a little snow that melted off very quickly. This time it has stayed cold enough that it isn't totally melted away yet, although as I write this I can see water dripping from the roof which means it won't be around much longer. But there was about a half an inch in some places, and that's enough to play in! They came inside and warmed back up and had some hot breakfast, then headed back outside to play again. It makes my heart smile so big to see them enjoy it. I'm going out to play again with them now, but today, I'm grateful for snow! ♥

24. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Notebooks

2011-02-03T22:55:00.003-06:00

I always have a notebook... I use them every day to keep track of the things I have to do at work, for writing thoughts, writing down things I read somewhere and want to remember, pasting cut out pictures that I like for one reason or another, grocery lists and other to-do lists. I am a list person, with so much going on if I don't write things down I will forget them. And I just filled up another one, so a couple days ago I got to go pick out a new one. Sort of silly but exciting thing for me. I picked up one after another until I finally found one by Ecojot that met all my criteria; recycled, not to big/not to small, thick sturdy front and back cover, spiral, pages inside not to thin, and cute of course :) Here it is!

For every notebook purchased, Ecojot will donate one school workbook or pencil to a child in need. Here's a little bit about them.

Ecojot was created in 2007. Mark Gavin, founder and his sister, designer Carolyn Gavin created green stationery designs that are printed and made in Canada. ecojot is an environmentally conscious stationery company that produces products for which the paper content is 100% post-consumer recycled. No new trees were cut in the making of these journals! The paper is acid free and processed chlorine free, and all inks and glues are vegetable based. The mill where the notebooks are made is even powered by biogas harnessed from a nearby landfill.
The "GIVE" program started in 2010 and uses a simple premise: With the sale of each 5x7", Jumbo journal and all eco sketchbooks, we will donate a school workbook or pencil to a child in need. - BUY 1, GIVE 1.
To date with your support ecojot has given over 70,000 notebooks to children in need around the world, including schools in Haiti, Kenya, Ghana, Zimbabwe & St Lucia.

23. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Sharing

2011-02-02T21:33:00.007-06:00

Today I'm grateful for unexpected gifts. Today someone offered something, for free, that they didn't need anymore. And we need it, and are so very appreciative of the offer. I am so filled with gratitude for gently used things being passed along instead of just being dumped in a landfill somewhere. I think so many things are just thrown away when a little creativity and elbow grease could make them usable and fun for others. So I am again mindful of the need for everyone to work together and share and of the wonderful things that come from that. So I thank you, red headed person who gave, and I promise to pay it forward! ♥

Image found at http://www.pool.org.au/image/gugu/our_character_describes_what_we_share

22. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Parent's Play Day

2011-02-01T20:51:00.002-06:00

Today was parent's play day at the boys school... we were all invited to attend their PE class and participate. I was a little worried I wouldn't be able to get away from work in time, but I did and I am so glad I went! We had a blast. There were stations set up and we spent 5 minutes at each station, my fingers are so cold right now that even if I could think of something witty and clever I don't think I could type it, so I will just say that today I am grateful for the opportunities that I have to do things that my boys like to do with them. And for playing... playing is always great!

21. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Memories

2011-01-31T10:26:00.005-06:00

I grew up in a very strick religious household. There was modesty to be considered at all times, church attendance was several times per week and was very important, family prayer daily and then of course at meals, before bed, and whenever else it was needed. We also had a wheat grinder, made our own bread (baking fools we were) and flour, learned to sew and do needle work at a young age, when we were in high school attended a class durring the school year every school day just for our religion, and read our scriptures daily. Marriage was considered sacred, and much time was spent teaching us why we should honor and cherish our family and parents and spouses, and much time was spent teaching us ways to do this. We had church dances and other activities dedicated to keeping us busy with like minded people and teaching us something that was considered worthwhile at the same time. This was what I knew, and for me it was very comforting and was a nice way to live. There was always my church family to turn to, if I needed something or had something to give, and a thriving community filled with many kinds of people with a common goal.

I choose to no longer practice that specific religion, but I hold most of my memories of it in deep my heart and always will. It taught me so much. Some of it I have had to struggle to understand or come to terms with, some of it I discarded as I grew older and sorted things out for myself, and some of it I will forever appreciate and love. That's pretty much the way it is with most of our childhood experiences I think. We all have them, and as we mature we learn to see them for what they were, even to see that looking back with the wisdom of an adult they might have actually been different then we beleived they were as children. That as children we maybe didn't know that the adults in our lives had things going on that they were dealing with that affected our lives too. To me, there is peace in growing up and realizing that they did the absolute best they could with what they had. That if they fell "short", it was not because they didn't love us or were horrible people, it was because they were human beings learning and growing every day right along with us. And I realize that there are many community's out there... and think that at some point I will probably find one that I fit into... I hope.

Yesterday, I was sitting on the couch working on Riley's blanket. I turned on the TV, and happily discovered that Little House on The Prairie was on. Turns out, it was on all day and until at least 2am. I know this because I had to talk myself into turning off the TV mid episode at about 1:45am, knowing that my 6am alarm was not going to be pleasant, and the later I stayed up would only make it worse. I loved Little House as a child, and apparently, still do. I read ALL the books and watched the TV show whenever I could. Love that show. Little House on the Prairie is about a family living on a farm in Walnut Grove, Minnesota in the 1870s and 1880s, it was a loose adaptation of the Laura Ingalls Wilder's Little House books that I read and loved. It's got good old fashioned family values, friends, hard work, faith, humor, love, friendship, sharing, giving, dealing with problems, even crappy old Mrs Olsen who never failed to provide a perfect example of the way NOT to act or think. I still think sometimes it would be wonderful to live in that time period, without all of the modern conveniences of todays world. I'm sure I would miss some things, at least for a while... but maybe not.

20. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ The Body Stick

2011-01-30T23:51:00.003-06:00

Today I'm grateful for The Body Stick. Its 24 inches of of all over body massaging goodness! I can use it on myself, or use it on the boys, and if I'm really lucky sometimes the boys will use it on me. Massage is pretty important, and doing it myself is difficult at best. Since I sit in front of a computer all day my shoulders and neck and upper back (ok, and lower back and arms too...) get pretty tense. I try to breath and take breaks regularly to stretch, sit in my chair correctly and still there is tight muscle pain to deal with. This stick is amazing, a pretty worthy tool!

Here is the info from their website

What is The Stick?

The Stick is a revolutionary device used to segmentally compress and stretch muscle. It is highly effective in the treatment of muscle pain and trigger points.

The Stick provides the following benefits:

Prevent & Predict Muscle Injuries
Dramatically improve strength, flexibility and endurance
Rapidly prepare muscles for physical activity
Disperse the effects of lactic acid following activity
Accelerate muscle recovery

What is the Stick Made of, how long will it last?

Stick products are made of a space-age plastic that allow necessary flexibility of the tool and provide maximum compression of the muscles (the Stick contains no rubber or wood). The center rod of the Stick is surrounded by spindles which roll independently over the muscle. The handles provide maximum comfort in the grip. The Stick comes with a 90-day satisfaction guarantee, and a 1 year manufacturer's warranty against defects. With proper use, The Stick should last a lifetime.

Medical Talk:

The Stick converts non-compliant muscle to compliant muscle by performing what Dr. Travell calls stripping massage. In fact, this noted medical physician relates that, "deep stripping massage of the tender spot in the muscle was generally the treatment of choice for muscular rheumatism (myofascial trigger points) long before the turn of this century, and for fibrositis afterwards." The Stick allows people to self-perform general as well as segmental therapeutic procedures with a high degree of precision. These procedures remove the barriers to peak physical performance. It is the unassisted rolling, stretching, twisting and compressing of the muscle that diffuses barrier trigger points and converts non-compliant muscle to compliant muscle.

I think that pretty much sum's it up. I spent the day crocheting & cleaning, and at the end of the day, rolling the stick on my tired achy muscles was heaven! ♥

19. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Family Time

2011-01-29T05:23:00.002-06:00

Last week Husband and I talked about the appalling state of our home, it seems to have been taken over by STUFF, stuff everywhere, and it's unorganized and cluttered and just being in it has become unsettling. I think a messy home sometimes crowds out love and laughter. We've been busy, work and kids and life, and have settled into a pattern of doing the bare minimum to get by, and have not really stayed on top of the boys which means their stuff seems to have taken a life of it's own and has been deposited all over the house. Uggghh. It's time to clean it all up and then be vigilant and careful to not let the stuff take over again. So we're cleaning up this weekend, organizing, getting rid of the things we just don't need, and making places for the things we do need. I am excited! The possibilities are endless... we start with a mess and end with... whatever we want. Fresh. Clean. I do a lot of work around this house to keep it running, and mostly feel like the lone ranger. To have the whole family involved means a lot to me, and I totally looking forward to relaxing in our home again when we've finished. Husband says I walk around mostly spinning my wheels, which is insulting and I think shows no respect for my efforts, hey, at least I am trying here, but sadly I do see his point and acknowledge that it is at least partly true. I just can't get ahead of so much clutter, cleaning a little barely makes a dent in the mess and really only seems to provide a new spot for more stuff to be deposited on and quickly becomes a lost effort. So here's to our family working together and to our home and clearing the clutter so we can let more love and laughter in.

18. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Crochet

2011-01-28T17:12:00.003-06:00

A work in progress... someday I will finish ☺

Riley's blanket...still lot's to do! :)

17. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Talk Russian to Me

2011-01-27T15:15:00.002-06:00

Me, Mandy, Elena

I have been working with a woman from Russia since 1995. In the beginning she taught us a few words in Russian, and then we just sort of stopped. It's not that we weren't interested, we were all just busy and I suppose we just kept it in the back of our minds as something we would learn "someday". Someday arrived! A few weeks ago we started again, slowly, just learning a few basic words and now we have sign's up in the office and we are working on understanding how to pronounce things and the alphabet and some essential words and a few non-essential but fun words that may or may not be expletives. ☺

A few things have been particularly interesting, like sounds that they make that we just don't make here. Or at least I don't make them. And how to figure out how to phonetically write a sound out that I don't make? It's been fun to try to come up with letter combinations that reflect the sound. Turns out, it's probably just better to learn the Russian alphabet and what the letters stand for and how they sound... I was just a little intimidated that there are 32 letters, 5 look AND sound like English, and then it's all down hill from there. 7 letters look like English letters, but are not pronounced the same, and then 21 letters are nothing like English letters. Complicated. But really cool!

I started the boys out with a couple of sentences last night, and they thought it was the coolest thing in the world. They kept repeating them over and over, which made me really happy with my choice. I taught them to say:

Russian: Я тебя люблю
English: I love you.
Phonetic: ya tebya lyublyu

I also taught them to say It's time for bed, water, and I'm tired :)

So today, I am greatful to my friend Elena, for her patience with me and willingness to teach me. Я тебя люблю Elena!

And I think that this alphabet song, from Sesame Street in Russian, might be simple enough for me to learn from, and the boys too. Very useful stuff, thanks Elmo and friends. Hooray!

16. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ The Library... books and reading and more!

2011-01-26T06:10:00.026-06:00

I used to love to go to the library as a child with my mom and all my brothers and sisters. We went often, and I found the most marvelous things there. I have forgotten many of the books I read, but these have remained in my mind as favorites. I recently found a newly printed edition of the first Trixie Belden book at Half Priced Books (another really great place) and bought it for a couple dollars. As I started to read it's pages I was reminded of my 8 year old self... Dorrie was another series of stories I loved... if I ever locate a Dorrie book I will snatch it up too. I also loved the Bobbsey Twins and Nancy Drew, and The Hardy Boys.

As I grew into a pre-teen, my tastes matured... to old Harlequin Romances! I don't know why in the world my Mother ever let me read those as they seem to have sent me on a lifelong silly romantic goose chase and are probably the source of much of my confusion about relationships and how they work today. But all in all, the library was my favorite place to go, and still is.

I take my own kids now, and was thrilled when they recently "discovered" The Hardy Boys for themselves. Today I am thankful for the Library, where you can still go and check out a book (or CD or DVD or audio book) for free, and hold it in your hands, and turn the pages one at a time as you become lost in it's story.

I'm not sure if I ever read the book Island Hospital below... hmmmm... maybe I will check for it the next time I'm at the library :)

15. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Reminders

2011-01-25T15:25:00.008-06:00

I found an article, Letting Go of Attachment www.zenhabits.net and I really like it, and rather just write my rather simple thoughts about it, I figure it's worth sharing just as I found it. So today, I'm grateful for all the info out there at our fingertips, for learning new things things, and being reminded of things I've forgotten, and re-looking at things that need attention.

Letting Go of Attachment, from A to Zen

Full article found at link above. Summary below... nuff said. ♥

     If there’s one thing we all have in common it’s that we want to feel happy; and on the other side of that coin, we want to avoid hurting. Yet we consistently put ourselves in situations that set us up for pain.
     We pin our happiness to people, circumstances, and things and hold onto them for dear life. We stress about the possibility of losing them when something seems amiss. Then we melt into grief when something changes—a lay off, a break up, a transfer.
     We attach to feelings as if they define us, and ironically, not just positive ones. If you’ve wallowed in regret or disappointment for years, it can seem safe and even comforting to suffer.
     In trying to hold on to what’s familiar, we limit our ability to experience joy in the present. A moment can’t possibly radiate fully when you’re suffocating it in fear.
     When you stop trying to grasp, own, and control the world around you, you give it the freedom to fulfill you without the power to destroy you. That’s why letting go is so important: letting go is letting happiness in.
     It’s no simple undertaking to let go of attachment—not a one-time decision, like pulling off a band-aid. Instead, it’s a day-to-day, moment-to-moment commitment that involves changing the way you experience and interact with everything you instinctively want to grasp.
     The best approach is to start simple, at the beginning, and work your way to Zen.

Experiencing Without Attachment

Accept the moment for what it is.

Believe now is enough.
Call yourself out.

Define yourself in fluid terms.

Enjoy now fully.

Letting Go of Attachment to People

Friend yourself.

Go it alone sometimes.

Hold lightly.

Interact with lots of people.

Justify less.

Letting Go of Attachment to the Past

Know you can’t change the past.

Love instead of fearing.

Make now count.

Narrate calmly.

Open your mind.

Letting Go of Attachment to Outcomes

Practice letting things be.

Question your attachment.

Release the need to know.

Serve your purpose now.

Teach others.

Letting Go of Attachment to Feelings

Understand that pain is unavoidable.

Vocalize your feelings.

Write it down.

Xie Xie. (It means thank you in Chinese.)

Yield to peace.

Zen your now.

It won’t always be easy. Sometimes you’ll feel compelled to attach yourself physically and mentally to people and ideas—as if it gives you some sense of control or security. You may even strongly believe you’ll be happy if you struggle to hold onto what you have. That’s OK. It’s human nature.

Just know you have the power to choose from moment to moment how you experience things you enjoy: with a sense of ownership, anxiety, and fear, or with a sense of freedom, peace and love.

The most important question:

What do you choose right now?

14. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ planned relaxation

2011-01-24T20:11:00.003-06:00

Today, I am thankful for schedules. And for chill time. As far as schedules go, I really do appreciate having a schedule to keep, or something planned, or even just a basic idea of what I'd like to do with my time for the day. I usually function better that way. Left to my own devices, I tend to procrastinate just about everything until the last possible minute, then turn into a super-hero and churn it out in light speed... not really that cool even though it does give me an adrenalin rush. I do sometimes wonder what would result if I didn't procrastinate so often, and instead knocked out the things I need to do early, but with the single minded precision required to accomplish a task and do a good job at the last minute. Seems like a good thing to experiment with. Anyway, schedule free me tends to lead to this; I sleep in until my kids need brunch (yep, we're past breakfast time by this point) and then tiredly make food for them to eat, then lay my groggy self back on the couch to snuggle with the boys while they watch WAY to much TV, and then when I finally do rouse myself, I'm still feeling tired and sluggish, but have now managed to throw guilt into the mix and so all in all feeling pretty lousy. So I waste the day away, accomplish not very much, stay up way to late watching TV, and then fall asleep feeling ruffled and exhausted and unable to really say quite why. Yuck. So here's a better plan, for me anyway. Time designated just to relax. Call it chill time, or laziness, or relaxation time, or leisure time, or intermission, or quiet time, whatever you want to call it. That way I don't feel bad and like I should be doing something else, instead I know I am doing exactly what I need to be doing at that moment. Without a to do list or a schedule, it is impossible for me to keep up with everything that is being a mom or wife or friend or family member or employed person. There's just so much that has to be done, and so much I want to do, and so much I wish I could do that if I don't write it down or schedule it in it gets forgotten or overlooked. And a frazzled, guilt ridden, sluggish me is not really very much fun to be around. Hell, I don't even like to be around me when I am like that. So, here's to scheduling in chill time... it's really important sometimes, and I think everyone should indulge in it's deliciousness without torturing themselves by feeling bad for having done so. I think a little lazy is just lovely.

13. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Childs Play

2011-01-23T19:20:00.006-06:00

This child of mine... what a wonderful addition to the sea of people on this earth. He loved loved loved to dress up when he was a little. The more of his favorite toys he could attach to his body, the better. I have many pictures of my sweet little boy just like the one below, a green and white striped Dr Seuss hat and yellow kitchen gloves were regularly featured. And the ear to ear smile he wore was the icing on the cake. You know what? He still likes to dress up. The last time I went over to his place with the littles, he answered the door wearing a bear hat, complete with ears on top of his head and paws that hung down to cover his ears. It was brown and furry, and I instantly flashed back to him as a little boy when I saw him in it. ♥

Eldest sometime around 1997, all dressed up and excited about life!

I have another picture I want to include here, but am having trouble uploading. Will try again later. It is of the littles taken in 2006. They were outside, playing in the mud, in their underwear, and were just delighted with themselves. They threw mud all over the fence and themselves and had a great time. Eldest was actually there with them, but since he had reached the cool teenager phase, was not really into the mud stage.

I have snippets of brilliance to add to this, thoughts about how as adults we should be more unafraid to get all dressed up or play hard in the mud, stories of my own about when I did play in the mud, or didn't... but am out of time, and really, not exactly sure how to pry them from my mind and write them here so that what's written, and what's thought, match. And to write them so that they are interesting... is not as easy as it seems like it should be. Probably about time for me to let go and get muddy again huh? So today, as I listened to my 9 year old twins play and laugh and argue and chatter the day away, and as I remembered how my now almost 20 year old boy loved to do the same, I am grateful for children and their innocent and beautiful ability to be fully present and to enjoy (or not) every single second of their reality.

12. ♥ 40 Days of Love♥ Backyard Gardening!

2011-01-22T16:09:00.002-06:00

Fall garden 2010 has turned into food in 2011. I had a few setbacks, mostly from Chester who decided it was his own personal playground and digging spot, but I re-planted and some things survived his zeal. And it's almost time to think about the spring garden, and the first thing I am planting is a fence around my little garden spot. No more digging Chester!

11 ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Cups

2011-01-21T22:56:00.001-06:00

Yikes. Today... happened. Writing in a blog... seemed silly and unnecessary. And I temporarily lost my backbone and all focus today and turned into a big melted spot on my office floor... did I really want to blog about that? Not really. So, today is the perfect day to write a short and simple blip about something equally silly and sort of not really necessary in the big scheme of things. Cups. I love 'em. I'm talking about coffee and tea cups, and I like to buy them for people, really cool one's that look like the person I bought it for, and I like to collect them for myself. Here is my newest, from Starbucks. Interwoven hearts on one side, love on the other side.

10. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Love me Tender

2011-01-20T18:52:00.006-06:00

" I feel quite tender toward the little me, and thus, since the two are the same, toward the big me as well. This is revelatory."

I read this in someone's blog today, they were looking at the solemn expression on their face in a picture of themselves as a child, and it bounced around in my mind for a bit, then turned into a tear or two, and then ended up here.

So many times I feel very overwhelmed at all that has to be done... work, bills to pay, never ending housework & mountains of laundry, meals to prepare and shop for, and on and on and on. That's a partial list of what has to be done, and does not include the things I want or need to do, like spending time with my kids, sorting things out with my husband, yoga, running, reading, time with friends, being creative, learning etc... I feel like so many things are done hurriedly, and not done very well at all because I just don't have the time or energy. And if I let myself think about it, it makes me feel like a total loser. So many nights I plop down to sleep, exhausted and drained, late at night, and then turn on the TV just so I can turn my brain off and get stupid. This time would be clearly better spent sleeping, praying, meditating, or connecting with a real human, right? I see or read about these seemingly perfect people, who seem to be sane and smiling and remarkably successful at the things that I think matter, and it really sucks me in to a negative "I suck" state.

But you know what? I know better than that. I know that no matter how perfect someone might seem, they have things that they struggle with too. And that we are all out here, doing our best with what we have, trying to learn and grow (some more than others, but hey, I'm certainly in no position to judge) and trying to do what we can. Yeah, there is nothing wrong with trying to push myself, or trying to do things more mindfully, or trying new things, I figure that's how we grow. Sooner or later, bashing ourselves against something that doesn't yield might help us figure out that maybe we can take a different path, or maybe we can just be a little more tender with ourselves. Maybe we can remember the children we were, and remember that we really aren't so far removed from them, and love ourselves anyway, shortcomings and all. That's what I'm grateful for today, learning how to love me tender, shortcomings and all.

With a title like Love Me Tender I pretty much have to put a video of Elvis on here right? :)

9. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Sleep & Goodnight Stories

2011-01-19T21:18:00.003-06:00

Sleep. Today, I'm really thankful for sleep. When I'm being a responsible grown up, and actually go to bed at a reasonable hour (any hour that guarantees 8 hours of blissful sleep before wake up time) I always really appreciate the way I feel in the morning. You know, the way when the alarm goes off and I don't want to throw it out the window and snuggle back in bed for just "one more minute"? But alas, this does not happen as often as it should, and I usually get not enough sleep, which is the reason I am the way I am. Good thing to blame that on I think. Anyway, I do love to sleep. And I love to read. And I love my kids, so reading bedtime stories or saying prayers at bedtime with my guys is something I really look forward to. This goes back a bit, but one of my favorite books to read to the boys when they were smaller was Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown. A little goodnight moon, a couple of sleepy snuggling boys... what's not to love? We read many many books just before they drifted off to sleep, and it was a sweet time to share and cuddle.

Goodnight stars.
Goodnight air.
Goodnight noises everywhere.

Leonard Marcus wrote the following in Margaret Wise Brown’s biography:

Goodnight Moon is a supremely comforting evocation of the companionable objects of the daylight world. It is also a ritual preparation for a journey beyond that world, a leave-taking of the known for the unknown world of darkness and dreams. … [I]t is partly spoken in the voice of the child, who takes possession of that world by naming its particulars all over again, addressing them directly, one by one, as though each were alive, and bidding each goodnight. … The sense of an ending descends gradually, like sleep.

The boys are now 9, and the big boy is 19. I don't read them bedtime stories very often anymore, they are more interested in reading to themselves before they go to sleep. But I think that just maybe, tomorrow we will read a story or two for old times sake. Goodnight!

8. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Babies and Breath

2011-01-18T20:05:00.004-06:00

As I write this, my newest nephew, Emerson has just been born. He had some trouble breathing after birth, so he's being given some extra special care at the hospital and I hope & trust that they are doing everything they can to help him over this hurdle. I'm praying that he gets better quickly, and that his Mom and Dad make it through this without to much heartache. Babies. Babies are such amazing little things... I've had 3 of my own and had the privilege to be a part of the lives of the babies of my family and friends. It's a beautiful thing, truly a gift from God, the miracle of life. So sweet, so precious, and so full of everything that is good and sometimes stinky :) .

So we are born, and then we breathe. And somehow, as we get older, we forget how to breathe. Or at least I did. Holding my breath became more automatic then letting if flow freely and beautifully as it's meant to. So if you're like me, then you have to go to Yoga to re-learn how to breathe. Or ask my husband, since he has dedicated his life to that sort of thing and is a great source of information. Seems silly that something so natural and easy can be forgotten so deeply that it has to be re-learned. But it does.

So, today, I am grateful for babies, all the wonderful babies and for breath, because simply breathing right or using our breath in different ways can can transform our lives and open our eyes to the love bubbles and butterflies that are all around us just like babies do. Ever notice what is happening with your breath when you're tense? For me it's shallow and infrequent, followed by a deep sigh produced by my oxygen starved body. Usually all it takes to relax is to take some full deep breaths, or if I am really upset many many many full deep breaths :) Awesome huh?


This is my niece Sion at 2 and a half months ♥

7. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Thoughts

2011-01-17T21:23:00.003-06:00

Thoughts. Today, I'm grateful for thoughts, and how changing them can change how I feel physically and mentally, and can take me from a place of fear, sadness or stress to a sweet place of peace and truth, a place where love's eyes twinkle and grace shines, a place where kindness lives and laughter sings.

...Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.

- Philippians 4:8

All that we are is the result of what we have thought, if a man speaks or acts with an evil thought, pain follows him. If a man speaks or acts with a pure thought, happiness follows him, like a shadow that never leaves him -Buddha

For a really long time much of my thinking time was wasted on fear. Naturally, the outcome of such thought was often less than cool. The fear mindset is something that I learned as a young child and carried with me as I grew, and I was about 25 years old before I realized the enormity of my fear. And I had no idea what to do about it or where to start, all I knew for a long time was that there was a better way and I was determined to get there. It has taken longer then I thought, and I still have a ways to go. I have prayed a lot, learned a little here and a little there, and here I am, 16 years later. Fear? Yes, it still lingers. But not as much as it used to. And every moment that passes brings me just a little closer to love all the time.

So today, as I think about where I started and how far I've come, I am hopeful. If I can do one thing with what I have learned about fear, it would be to be able to teach my kids a better way to live in love instead of fear, and to be able to teach them by example.

Here is a meditation for intuition and conquering fear from the book A Woman's Book of Meditation by Hari Kaur Khalsa. (We have done it several times in class, and I think it is amazing!)
This meditation has a special breath pattern that helps you conquer fear and awaken your intuition. As you suspend your breath, you automatically trigger the release of chronic fears by creating a still point for your mind and body. Practice this meditation to move beyond fear and into your meditative and intuitive mind.
Sit in easy pose. Relax your elbows by your sides and bring your forearms parallel to the floor and angled out so that they follow the angel of your legs. With your palms facing upward, bring the fingertips of each hand together. This is called Closed Lotus Mudra. Close your eyes and focus them on your Brow Point. Hold this eye focus. Inhale deeply and exhale. Suspend your breath out as you mentally repeat the mantra sequence Saa Taa Naa Maa 4 times. You will be holding your breath out for for a total of 16 counts. Inhale deeply, exhale, and begin the sequence again. Continue this sequence with the mental chanting at your brow for 11 minutes. To end, inhale, suspend your breath briefly, and then relax.

6. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Hugs

2011-01-16T18:39:00.003-06:00

A hug says I love you, or hello, or good to see you, or how are you, or about a million other things... A hug filled with love... what a cool thing to share. Here's to hugs, and sharing them as often as we can. Today, I'm grateful for hugs.

5. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ What am I giving? More love.

2011-01-15T14:34:00.004-06:00

As I sit here to write this, it is time for me to be leaving for the zoo. The boys Cub Scouts Pack is camping out tonight at the zoo, and it seems like we are going. Last minute decision. Just before it was time to clock out and go home for the weekend, after a very busy week intensified by a pretty wretched case of cedar fever, when my only desire was to go to Yoga and then go home and be with my family all weekend, doing as little as possible, Husband called.

It seems that Ducky was pretty upset that they were not going to the Cub Scout camp-out at the zoo. The registration closed weeks ago and anyway, after the craziness of the last couple of months, we had decided that it was not something we would be attending. I checked around, and in true cub scout fashion, was told that they could still go, and that last minute arrangements would be made to fit us in! Then, Husband told me that he wouldn't be going because he was going to spend the day fixing the heater at his school. I hadn't known about the job he had scheduled, and had assumed his intent was to take the boys himself. My heart sank. I did not want to go without him. I really did not want to go. It's cold and raining, we will be sleeping on the cement floor in sleeping bags, and there are no other women going. And I wanted him, Husband, to be there with us. And I would miss my yoga class. And what about resting? And having some relaxing time? And and and and...
During yoga last night, I kept coming back to something I had been thinking about earlier in the day, before the zoo came up. I was thinking about what I put out, as in energy, emotion, effort, all that kind of stuff. I was reminding myself that no matter what anyone else is putting out, I am responsible for how I react, and for what I put out in return. So I was thinking that a really good way to remember this when I feel stressed or annoyed or less than loving, was to repeat this simple question to myself often "What am I giving?".

I love my kids with all of my heart, and I do and will do just about anything for them. I know they are excited about this trip, what 9 year old boy wouldn't be? Sleeping in the zoo! Spending time with their cub pack! A whole zoo to themselves for hours before it opens to the public! A scavenger hunt... at the zoo! Sounds like heaven to them. They don't care that it's raining, or cold, or that mommy is tired. They are really excited. And so we go. And I am happy to have the time with them, and for the getting to sharing such an exciting adventure that I am sure they will remember for the rest of their life.
And I will repeat over and over in my head "What am I giving? More love." This is my only goal for the year. Give more love. Look at the bright side of things, focus on what's good and beautiful, and let the other stuff go. Give more love, and give it when it's not convenient, give it when it's raining, and give it when it's cold. And give it with a grateful heart, knowing that loving is what this life is really all about anyway. Time to go. Today, I am grateful for giving and loving.

Update: Well, the Fort Worth Zoo didn't happen after all. The rain was really heavy, and after driving an hour and 20 minutes, I still hadn't even made it to Georgetown. I was really uncomfortable (read; freaking out!) because we passed a lot of accidents, visibility was really bad, and my car hydroplaned a couple of times. So we turned around and came back home. High's and lows today for sure, and I don't mean the weather. So although I completely lost that lovin' feeling on more than one occasion today, I keep coming back to continue on. I hope that is good enough for now, because it's my all.

4. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Ipod

2011-01-14T17:01:00.011-06:00

These things I am grateful for will be big and amazing (like my boys) or small silly things I enjoy. I'm making today's thing a smallish thing. I use it a lot so its worth a mention. I am greatful for my ipod! I have it loaded to capacity with all kinds of music, podcasts, yoga video's and audio books. I use it in the car, at my house, while running, at work, it's a pretty sweet little thing! Pretty weak as far as a blog post goes, but hey... it is just an ipod. I especially love the two little guys in the picture with it! ♥

I do not have this groovy tp holder, but it made me laugh so I am including the picture. :)

I would be a little worried about this with so many boys in my house! From http://www.podcastingnews.com/

3. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Cold Weather in Austin

2011-01-13T06:46:00.004-06:00

Brrr... it's cold outside. Today, I am grateful for the cold, it sure does make me appreciate the heat we have here most of the time! I wouldn't mind some snow, a couple of days worth should do the trick. Just enough to close the schools and miss some work, do a little sledding and build a snow man, maybe have a snow ball fight, and then back inside to sit in front of the fire. Alas, no snow for us, but the air sure is crisp and cold. I'm loving it, as long as it doesn't stick around much longer :)!

2. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Beauty in Everything

2011-01-12T21:42:00.004-06:00

Today I stumbled across something I wasn't expecting. It shouldn't have been there, I never expected to like it but I more than liked it, I respected it, I savored it, I learned from it, I appreciated it, and I was very humbled by it. It doesn't really matter what it was, what matters is that it was there, and I was awake enough to see it for all that it was. I think it is sometimes easy to approach something with a closed mind. If I expect something will be a certain way, looking beyond my expectations and allowing myself to see that there might be more is maybe not always the easiest thing to do, but wow, it sure was good today. Today I am grateful for looking beyond what I am comfortable with and seeing that there is so much more. I will find beauty in all, and love with all that I am. Sat Nam.

I took these pictures at the park. I didn't notice the roots until I tripped over them... upon closer inspection I loved how interesting and beautiful they are!

1. ♥ 40 Days of Love ♥ Littles

2011-01-11T17:16:00.030-06:00

Ya want to know the best way to get yourself out of a funk? Start looking around you and counting your blessings, and saying thank you to everyone for everything. So I might be in need of this sort of deliberate pondering on gratitude, since I seem to be in a bit of a funk. Or is it cedar allergies? Hard to tell the difference sometimes. I have so much love in my heart, and yet I'm having trouble tuning out my selfish stuff and tuning in to what matters. So whether this is a funk, or allergies, or just my natural somewhat grumpy state, I'm thinking it's a pretty good time to remember to see beyond the icky stuff and ponder the good stuff of life. So much is good! So much is beautiful! So many many lovely things. So many opportunities for growth and change, so many chances to renew and give. So many new ways to start again, or continue on.

Today, I am grateful for Ducky and Bobo. Here's me and the boys, in front of a huge open window looking out over the San Antonio Hill Country... Thank you for loving me with your giggly joyful selves, for forgiving me when I am impatient, for trusting me, for sharing your secrets and dreams with me, for the cuddles, and the pushes away as you're growing older now, thank you for reminding me what love really is and for being such wonderful little boys. How quickly time has passed with you two... a typical lament from a mother I know, but it seems like just yesterday I found out you were coming and I fell in love with you as you grew stronger in my tummy. I was huge with you, but so excited and scared all mixed together. Then you were here, and the years have passed quickly and I am so filled with gratitude for having the time I have had with you. I vow to work harder at not getting grouchy when you eat slow boys, it really just doesn't matter when I look at the big picture, and you seem to be healthy so I will trust that it is all working out. :) I love you guys so very much.

I thank you God for this most amazing day, for the leaping greenly spirits of trees, and for the blue dream of sky and for everything which is natural, which is infinite, which is yes. ~e. e. cummings

Happy New Year, 2011

2011-01-01T12:35:00.008-06:00

This year, I have one resolution. To love more. ♥ This, to me is the best, most important thing I can do.

Rachael Yamagata - The Reason Why

2010-12-04T10:41:00.001-06:00

Ray Lamontagne - Shelter

2010-12-04T10:40:00.001-06:00

Ray Lamontagne - Hold You In My Arms

2010-12-03T10:30:00.001-06:00

Imogen Heap - Hide and Seek

2010-12-03T10:26:00.001-06:00

"Stop your stinkin' thinkin'"

2010-11-26T14:03:00.002-06:00

Mind Matters

Free Your Thoughts

Years ago, motivational teacher Zig Zigler opened his seminars with the statement, “Give yourself a checkup from the neck up and stop your stinkin’ thinkin’.” He was referring to how negative thoughts limit our possibilities and achievements. To accomplish anything, the first step is creating the thought. Successful people allow thoughts that lead to hope and a plan, sparking the creativity and positivity that is our birthright.

Negative thinking (including fear, doubt and hopelessness) stops us. Here’s an exercise to create a positive mind-set. Watch your thoughts, be an astute observer. When a negative thought appears, such as, “That person meant to cut me off in traffic,” STOP, take four long deep breaths and ask yourself, “Is this really true?” Breathe deeply again and examine the thought thoroughly. If your investigation reveals that the thought is actually an opinion or supposition, switch it to the positive possibility and you’ve stopped the stinkin’ thinkin’! Free your mind and see what happens!

I really liked this... it's honest and simple... so I copied it word for word from the Yoga Mint website :)

12/10: Update :) The Yoga Mint website address is http://www.yogamint.com/. They have lots of really great information and articles. Check it out!

This picture is of Eldest and the Littles a couple years ago. These three boys are pretty free thinking individuals... I am so proud of them and it is such a true pleasure to be their Mom and to share their lives.

Happy Thanksgiving

2010-11-24T17:19:00.001-06:00

♥Kundalini Yoga, The Yoga of Awareness. I love it! ♥

2010-11-19T21:28:00.007-06:00

This picture is the album cover for the album "Chants From The Soul" by Guru Amrit Kaur

Here's what I love about Kundalini Yoga. The exercises we do to loosen up our spines especially hip circles, breath work, mantra, chanting, the gong, unusual poses... like the frog :), staying in a pose for longer than I think I can, saying or hearing the words chakra or shakti, sometimes seeing white when I look through my brow point, feeling the prana move around, just sitting and feeling, learning about the chakra's and what it all means, that I can project love, feeling so full of love and peace, learning, sharing the space with everyone there, singing Long Time Sun at the end and thinking about how sweet and loving the words are, tea.

Here's some info about it.

Benefits of Kundalini Yoga

Strengthens the nervous system
Balances Emotions
Enlivens sense of awareness
Increases energy level
Brings clarity to the mind
Encourages sense of peace
Reduces stress
Increases lung capacity for better breathing
Strengthens the immune system
Supports and encourages personal transformation and growth
Orients consciousness to create happiness and health

♥♥

From www.akalsukhsingh.com:

~Question: What is Kundalini Yoga?~Answer: by Yogi Bhajan(There are numerous ways to answer this question. This is just one of them.)

Kundalini Yoga’s origins come from the beginning of time and seem to have roots in the wisdom traditions of every culture in which a spark of consciousness has been lit. It gives the tools, technology, the sadhana, the personal discipline, to awaken awareness.

Kundalini Yoga is a science which works on the seven chakras, the arc line and the aura. It works directly on the total energy, and that flow of energy has one simple way: either YOU sway it or IT sways you.

Either you are above the energy riding it or you go below the energy and it rides you. That is where Kundalini Yoga fits in : you will learn to ride your energy, to experience it and penetrate any given situation to attain balance.
What is Kundalini actually? It is your creative potential. You experience it when the energy of the glandular system combines with the energy of the nervous system to create such a sensitivity that the totality of the brain receives signals and integrates them. Then you become totally and wholly aware, and your creative potential becomes available to you.
The power of Kundalini Yoga lies in the actual experience. It goes right into your heart and extends your consciousness so you may have a wider horizon of grace and of knowing the truth. Ultimately you come to understand your existence in relationship to the universe and understand you already are, and this brings you to the practical experience of Infinity. You can then radiate creativity and infinity in all aspects of your daily life.

Kundalini Yoga is the fastest way to establish an aligned relationship between the body, mind and the soul.

Brand spankin' new Austin Systema logo!

2010-11-10T14:16:00.006-06:00

I am proud of him, my husband, for the work he does! He loves what he does, and I think his students are lucky to have him as a teacher and friend. He puts a lot of time and energy into teaching because he believes in Systema and in teaching and in his students. His website is www.austinsystema.com if you want to check out what he does.:)

Hi, I'm Dracula, and this is my twin brother, Jackula!

2010-10-31T22:21:00.004-05:00

This year for Halloween, Ducky and Bobo decided that they BOTH wanted to be dracula. And they were totally ok with having identical costumes. On Halloween night, I helped them into their costumes, got their makeup all done (they were very excited about the nasty teeth and blood) and Bobo (on the right in the picture above) said something that just totally made me laugh out loud. He said "Hi, I'm Dracula, and this is my twin brother, Jackula." What funny, sweet, amazing, creative little boys I have!

Firework - Katy Perry

2010-10-29T20:22:00.002-05:00

Link to Some Systema clips...

2010-10-23T16:35:00.001-05:00

http://www.russianmartialart.com/main.php?page=clips

Spell what?

2010-10-22T15:52:00.001-05:00

Originally. That's how you spell it. NOT origionally, which is how I almost always spell it. There is also grateful, which I always spell greatful, and stretching which I always spell streatching. I always catch the mistake, because I can see that it is wrong... but it doesn't change the fact that my first inclination is to spell these words wrong. And I know how to spell them... I suppose I prefer my own made up version. And that makes me smile! We humans are such quirky odd things sometimes. :)

Keb'Mo' - Live Your Life and Shave Yo Legs

2010-10-07T20:40:00.002-05:00

Happy Birthday to Me :)

A Poem

2010-09-18T12:10:00.001-05:00

My smile flew away last night

I just sat and watched it go

Today my face emit's no light

And my heart is packed in snow.

I'll do the things I know to do

To bring my smile home.

I'll pray, and breath and sing to you

Till again i'm saying, "ohm".

Tai Chi, Yoga, Breathing, Shadows & Love at The Grand Canyon

2010-09-05T11:24:00.001-05:00

The Grand Canyon. At the end of our family trip in this summer, we stopped off at The Grand Canyon. Gene did some Tai Chi, I did a little Yoga, we breathed, hiked a little, played with our shadows, and looked and loved. The boys thought it was "really beautiful and awesome". Tyler wasn't with us, but we took him years ago when he was about 8 years old, so it was kinda cool that we were got to go to go with the little boys when they were 9. Its a good age to go. Really I think any age is a good age to go.

So I took some pictures of Gene while he did Tai Chi, his form is really smooth, he makes it look so easy. Really he makes all movement look easy! He does Tai Chi at his school sometimes, here is a quote from his website. "We practice the Yang Family Long Form and qigong by Professor Teng Yingbo. While the form we study contains 108 movements, we spend most of our time practicing qigong or studying the first section of the form."Gene Smithson, Instructor, Austin Systema

Why I run...

2010-08-28T14:27:00.001-05:00

Running+Anlla=LOVE

Today on my morning run, sweat streaming down my face and sunscreen burning my eyes, as I listened to my ipod and steadily put one foot down in front of the other, I felt so happy! I was thinking about all the different reasons I run.

It's a little alone time
Time to think about whatever I want, no distractions
I love the feel of muscles moving together to make each step happen
I love the spontanious ear to ear smile that I wear and the runner's high
I love to sweat... gross I know but so good for you!
I love the feeling of peace and accomplishment I have when I finish.
I love the way I can start a run upset about one thing or another, feeling lonely or sad, but by the time I am done I feel rejuvinated and strong and capable.
Prayer, music, breath, thoughts... I alternate between listening to one of these things while I run, and each one is wonderful.
I love it when I become more aware of some part of my body that I don't usually think of, and how I can change my posture or stride or breath and make it feel better or different.
I love smelling the air, feeling the sun, seeing the trees and people.
I love the sound of my breath as it fills my body with goodness.
Ok, I guess it's great for my body and my heart and lungs... but I really love what it does for my head! :)

A baby bean was born...

2010-08-28T07:29:00.002-05:00

Our newest family member, Riley Elizabeth Evans. Riley was born on August 25th 2010 to Kesit and David Evans. I'm already in love!

What to do ♥

2010-07-24T02:37:00.005-05:00

When you say something to someone, that is good and honestly not negative or anything, and the way you say it makes it sound to them like you meant something negative, and the more you try to explain the more angry they become and the more sure they are right, and the more frustrated you become at being so completely misunderstood, what should you do? If you know you are right and think if they would just see it for what it really was they wouldn't be mad any more, does that mean you should keep trying to explain?
And if when you try to explain, they reject every explanation and decide that they just flat out don't beleive that you meant what you really did mean? What then?

Should you apologize to them? Ask questions to try to find out how they arrived at their conclusion? Should you just let it go? Is it possible to let something like that go, without it looking like you are saying that they were right all along? Does it matter? Isn't it better to just swallow your pride and apologize anyway, and know that you know the truth and that will have to suffice? Because if what you truly wanted at the start of the whole bumbled conversation was good and loving, then no mater the route, shouldn't your goal be to end up there?

And trying to convince someone they are wrong when they have decided you are wrong is never a winning plan really. So I suppose I have answered my question. Bad delivery does trump good intention if the receiver is unable to see through the bad delivery to the good in the intention. Which means that for all your good intentions, if you did a bad job of saying what you had to say, you are responsible for any misunderstandings the receiver experienced. And the best thing to do in that situation is probably to apologize and walk away and give them some space and time to recover. Not to try to keep explaining over and over why you are right, not to try to convince them of anything except that you are very sorry you did such a bad job from the start and that you will try to do a better job next time. And then maybe if you leave the person alone for a while, they will think it all over and someday be able to see your good intention. But maybe not. And if they never do you should probably just write it off to a difficult lesson learned on your part.

I don't like this lesson. It is a very hard one for me, but I can see that I can somehow master this it would make a big difference. I don't mean to be a sloppy talker... I get nervous or excited sometimes and things come out wrong. It will be really difficult for me to fix that, and I'm not entirely sure how to do it but fixing it and not ever having to experience this again would sure be a relief for me. And for the receiver I am sure. And since the ultimate goal is love, beautiful wonderful love, seems to me it's the right thing to do.

Cancun, ahhh... I mean Texas!

2010-07-21T10:39:00.004-05:00

No Cancun in February for our family... we will pick a Texas (or Florida? ) beach instead. ♥

Seriously? I said that??? Why?

2010-07-19T18:55:00.004-05:00

Ever say something and then instantly wish you hadn't? I have this disease. Apparently, it is viral, because it keeps coming back. At 40 years old I would have thought I would have mastered the art of thinking before I speak, but sadly I have not. So if you see me walking around with duct tape covering my mouth, please don't be alarmed. Although I suppose the more mature thing would be to just thinking before I speak... I fear that this is a concept that just might be more than I can master. And where is my rewind button? Wouldn't that be nice? If I could have a rewind option, and start again on a better note when I realize I may have said something obnoxious or nutty. Maybe I could just have something tattooed on my forehead to warn anyone who hears me that I tend to speak from my heart and not my head, which seems to be more of an emotional creature than a logical one. Hmmmm... a vow of silence might be just what I need. Or maybe some well placed duck tape :)

Homemade Goodness

2010-07-18T11:16:00.006-05:00

Our Favorite Blueberry Muffins
2 1/4 cups finely ground oats *
1 tbsp double acting baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
2 tbsp honey
1 large egg
1 cup milk
1/8 cup canola oil
1/8 cup unsweetened applesauce
blueberries (fresh or frozen)
turbinado

Preheat oven to 400 degrees and lightly grease muffin tins. Stir together all dry ingredients and all wet ingredients except blueberries and turbinado in two separate bowls until blended, then add together and gently stir. Don't over mix. If batter is to thin, add a little more ground oats or flour. Fill each tin with approx 1/4 cup of batter. After filling tins, add about 5 blueberries to the top of each muffin, and gently push berry about 1/2 way into batter. If you use more blueberries, adjust your cooking time because the extra moisture extends it. Top each muffin with sprinkle of turbinado sugar. Bake for 20-25 minutes, until golden brown.

* I put oats in the blender and blend them up until the consistency of all purpose flour. I don't measure until after they are blended. It also works well to use 1 1/4 cup blended oats, 1 cup dry malt-o-meal OR 2 1/4 cups of any combination of flour (all-purpose, wheat, rice... whatever you like!) Different types of flour will make the batter consistency change, so just add more or less until it is right.

Parents Forget

2010-07-15T09:20:00.004-05:00

I was listening to an audio book in my car yesterday on the way home from work. "How to win friends and influence people" by Dale Carnegie. If you haven't already read it, I highly recommend it. Anyway, the reader read this story and it moved me so much I thought I would share it. I too sometimes find myself in this place...so consumed with getting things done or with my own thoughts that I forget to appreciate the sweetness of my boys Tyler, Jack and Elias. Here it is...

"Father Forgets" written by W. Livingston Larned

Listen, son: I am saying this, as you lie asleep, one little paw crumpled under your cheek and the blond curls stickily wet on your damp forehead. I have stolen into your room. Just a few minutes ago, as I sat reading my paper in the library, a stifling wave of remorse swept over me. Guiltily I came to your bedside.

There are the things I was thinking son: I had been cross to you. I scolded you as you were dressing for school because you gave your face merely a dab with the towel. I took you to task for not cleaning your shoes. I called out angrily when you threw some of your things on the floor. At breakfast I found fault, too. You spilled things. You gulped down your food. You put your elbows on the table. You spread butter too thick on your bread. And as you started off to play and I made for my train, you turned and waved a hand and called, “Goodbye, Daddy!” and I
frowned, and said in reply, “Hold your shoulders back!”

Then it began all over again in the late afternoon. As I came up the road I spied you, down on your knees, playing marbles. There were holes in your stockings. I humiliated you before your boyfriends by marching you ahead of me to the house. Stockings were expensive – and if you had to buy them you would be more careful! Imagine that, son, from a father!

Do you remember, later, when I was reading in the library, how you came in timidly,
with a sort of hurt look in your eyes? When I glanced up over my paper, impatient at the interruption, you hesitated at the door. “What is it you want?” I snapped.
You said nothing, but ran across in one tempestuous plunge, and threw your arms around my neck and kissed me, and your small arms tightened with an affection that God had set blooming in your heart and which even neglect could not wither. And then you were gone, pattering up the stairs.

Well, son, it was shortly afterwards that my paper slipped from my hands and a terrible sickening fear came over me. What has habit been doing to me? The habit of finding fault, of reprimanding – this was my reward to you for being a child. It was not that I did not love you; it was that I expected too much of youth. I was measuring you by the yardstick of my own years.

And there was so much that was good and fine and true in your character. The little heart of you was as big as the dawn itself over the wide hills. This was shown by your spontaneous impulse to rush in and kiss me good night. Nothing else matters tonight, son. I have come to your bedside in the darkness, and I have knelt there, ashamed!

It is a feeble atonement; I know you would not understand these things if I told them to you during your waking hour. But tomorrow I will be a real daddy! I will chum with you, and suffer when you suffer, and laugh when you laugh. I will bite my tongue when impatient words come. I will keep saying as if it were a ritual: “He is nothing but a child – a little child!”

I am afraid I have visualized you as a man. Yet as I see you now, crumpled and weary in your cot, I see that you are still a baby. Yesterday you were in your mother’s arms, your head on her shoulder. I have asked too much, too soon.

I have a picture of Tyler at this age, asleep in his bed, surrounded by all his stuffed animals. This one is of Jack and Elias, little brothers, so much like their big brother. ♥ So sweet!

Taking a moment to look around...

2010-07-13T16:27:00.008-05:00

So often I find myself going through the motions, moving from one task to the next, completing each (or as is more often the case, partially completing each). It's so easy for me to get caught up in being busy at work, busy as a mother or wife, busy with housework or exercise... day to day stuff that has to be done. How much more enjoyable my days would be if I spent a little more time looking around me, appreciating every tiny miracle. This isn't a new idea, or something I haven't done a million times before, but for every time I do it, I certainly let many chances pass me by. There is so much beauty in this world, in so many forms, it's everywhere! So today I'm taking a minute, as often as I can, to open my eyes and my heart and to really see, and I'm having a really good day! I hope you do the same.

This picture is of Jack and Elias at the Barton Creek Greenbelt in July'09.

The link below will take you to a short video on YouTube that is so sweet. Well worth the 5 minutes and 33 seconds it will take you to watch it. This man's voice is so soothing and his simple message is peaceful and thought provoking. A wonderful reminder! I loved this today, I hope you will too.

"A Good Day" With Brother David Steindl-Rast

Grand Canyon, 7/1/2010

2010-07-11T08:31:00.004-05:00

"The wonders of the Grand Canyon cannot be adequately represented in symbols of speech nor by speech itself. The resources of the graphic art are taxed beyond their powers in attempting to portray its features... The glories and beauties of form, color and sound unite in the Grand Canyon... It has infinite variety and no part is ever duplicated. Its colors, although many and complex at any instant, change with the ascending and declining sun... You cannot see the Grand Canyon in one view...but to see it you have to toil from month to month through this labyrinths...but if strength and courage are sufficient for the task, by a year's toil a concept of sublimity can be obtained never again to be equaled on hither side of Paradise." -John Wesley Powell

Gene doing Tai Chi on the rim of the Grand Canyon... beautiful!

Looking out...

Looking in...

Looking up... Elias saw this amazing double rainbow first!

Family Reunion, Walnut Creek California June 2010

2010-07-10T03:20:00.014-05:00

Happy Birthday Littles!

2010-06-11T23:57:00.004-05:00

June 11, 2001 the most wonderful twin boys in the world were born. Today they turned 9 years old, and it has been such a pleasure being their mommy! My husband and I are so blessed.

This is the birthday cake they wanted to make, a bug mountain full of gross creepy crawly plastic bugs, snakes, mice, spiders & lizards. Little boy heaven I suppose, the best part was making it together!

Grace Potter - Tiny Light

2010-05-29T20:47:00.004-05:00

Forced picture session... yep... I sure did!

2010-05-10T14:25:00.004-05:00

The obligatory "say cheese" photo... I like the silly ones better I think! Love Love Love these kids!